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Title:The End (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #13)
Format Type:Ebook
Author:
Publisher:HarperCollins Publishers
ISBN:0064410161
ISBN 13:
Number of Pages:368
Category:Fiction, Young adult, Childrens, Fantasy, Mystery

The End (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #13) by Lemony Snicket, Brett Helquist

PDF, EPUB, MOBI, TXT, DOC The End (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #13) The last volume of the fabulously popular A Series of Unfortunate Events series in which the history of the Baudelaire orphans is brought to its end .

You are presumably looking at the back of this book or the end of the end The end of the end is the best place to begin the end because if you read the end from the beginning of the beginning of the end to the end of the end of the end you will arrive at the end of the end of your rope .

This book is the last in A Series of Unfortunate Events and even if you braved the previous twelve volumes you probably can t stand such unpleasantries as a fearsome storm a suspicious beverage a herd of wild sheep an enormous bird cage and a truly haunting secret about the Baudelaire parents .

It has been my solemn occupation to complete the history of the Baudelaire orphans and at last I am finished You likely have some other occupation so if I were you I would drop this book at once so the end does not finish you .

With all due respect .

Lemony Snicket

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The Reptile Room (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #2), The Miserable Mill (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #4), The Vile Village (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #7), The Bad Beginning (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #1), The Carnivorous Carnival (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #9), The Ersatz Elevator (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #6), The Wide Window (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #3), The Grim Grotto (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #11), The Slippery Slope (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #10), The Austere Academy (A Series of Unfortunate Events, #5)
p i Dear Reader i p p If you have just picked up this book then it is not too late to put it back down Like the previous books in A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS there is nothing to be found in these pages but misery despair and discomfort and you still have time to choose something else to read p p Within the chapters of this story Violet Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire encounter a darkened staircase a red herring some friends in a dire situation three mysterious initials a liar with an evil scheme a secret passageway and parsley soda p p I have sworn to write down these tales of the Baudelaire orphans so the general public will know each terrible thing that has happened to them but if you decide to read something else instead you will save yourself from a heapful of horror and woe p p i With all due respect i p p Lemony Snicket p, Dear Reader br br You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake so please put it down Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V F D has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows an angry mob a newspaper headline the arrest of innocent people the Deluxe Cell and some very strange hats It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of the Baudelaire children s lives and write them all down but you may prefer to do some other solemn and sacred thing such as reading another book instead br br With all due respect br br i Lemony Snicket i, Dear Reader br br If you have picked up this book with the hope of finding a simple and cheery tale I m afraid you have picked up the wrong book altogether The story may seem cheery at first when the Baudelaire children spend time in the company of some interesting reptiles and a giddy uncle but don t be fooled If you know anything at all about the unlucky Baudelaire children you already know that even pleasant events lead down the same road to misery br br In fact within the pages you now hold in your hands the three siblings endure a car accident a terrible odor a deadly serpent a long knife a large brass reading lamp and the appearance of a person they d hoped never to see again br br I am bound to record these tragic events but you are free to put this book back on the shelf and seek something lighter br br With all due respect br br Lemony Snicket, In their desperate search for something lost the Baudelaire children encounter new and terrible horrors including mushrooms a mechanical monster a distressing message from a lost friend and tap dancing Ages br br Dear Reader br br Unless you are a slug a sea anemone or mildew you probably prefer not to be damp You might also prefer not to read this book in which the Baudelaire siblings encounter an unpleasant amount of dampness as they descend into the depths of despair underwater br br In fact the horrors they encounter are too numerous to list and you wouldn t want me even to mention the worst of it which includes mushrooms a desperate search for something lost a mechanical monster a distressing message from a lost friend and tap dancing br br As a dedicated author who has pledged to keep recording the depressing story of the Baudelaires I must continue to delve deep into the cavernous depths of the orphans lives You on the other hand may delve into some happier book in order to keep your eyes and your spirits from being dampened br br With all due respect br Lemony Snicket